~Just Nick~

Fuckin' ignorant people!!!

2007-10-12T14:37:00.000-07:00

So about a week ago I got a letter from one of my girlfriends from back in the day....and it was a very sweet letter! At first it really didn't phase me too much...but after I read it again I couldn't believe what her friends had asked her! Who the hell asks someone "Do you feel responsible for the way he is now?" Ok I'm sorry but that is just pure IGNORANCE! Now I'm not attacking anyone or anything I'm just stating my point of view on this because it just annoys the hell outta me that people still think this way about things!!!

I dated a few girls between 6th and 10th grade and honestly I only really remember the important ones that were actually around for a while. I may have had a few shorter dating periods with some girls but I don't really remember. Besides who and how many I did date is NOT important! What is important is that every girl I did date needs to know it's not their fault I am "this way!" I am the way I am because I've always been this way. I was born this way, and back then I was really confused about who I was!!! I can honestly say that each girl I had a significant relationship with has touched my life in one way or another. They all still and always will have a place in my heart for the simple fact that they played a key roll in helping me find myself! I do not regret anything that I've done in my life and honestly probably never will because everything that I have been through at this point in my life has made me the man I am today! It really sucks that someone would honestly think that one girl or anyone for that matter made me the way I am! It's ridiculous and completely NOT true!

I do want to take this time to thank those girls...you know who you are....for sticking by me during that rough period in my life and if I ever hurt you in any way shape or form I apologize because it was NOT my intention to hurt anyone! You have truly played a large roll in my life and I am thankful everyday that I had each of you in my life!!! I know who I am now and I'm completely happy with the way I turned out! I have been blessed to have had each of you in my life!

To the people out there who still do not understand the concept of how sexuality works....Think before you say stupid things because one of these days you are going to really offend someone or hurt someone's feelings!!! You honestly should NOT being talking about something if you don't understand it!!

Life is what YOU make it people!!! Live your life to the fullest and live it the way YOU want to live....never let ANYONE bring you down.....Life is too short to let other people make you feel you're not good enough or let what other people think control your life....I learned this the hard way!!

The next time you hear someone say something stupid about something they don't understand....educate them! We need to stop this "idea" that being gay is a choice because new flash......IT'S NOT!!!!

First post in a while....

2007-08-09T21:03:00.000-07:00

Well I"m gonna grab a blog from my MySpace and land it here for ya'll! But to some things up completely...I am single now....Jay and I are done and honestly I think I'm cool with it! but yea so here is a good long blog for ya!

So this all began when my friend Amanda introduced me to "Army Boy"....we'll call him that because he's still in the closet....We started to talk and he was amazing, EVERYTHING I was looking for in a man! We talked on and off constantly for about 7 or more hours, and just kept learning more and more about each other. We also discussed him coming to see me when he came home for two weeks and such, and it couldn't have been going any better. That night I went out to the bar with Aly and Kristin and didn't get home till about 5. Now where he is it's 6 hours ahead so I figured he would be up soon so I dropped him a note on myspace, a message not a comment, and then went to bed. Now is where it gets interesting! I got up the next day and went on myspace to check and see if he had written back, and he hadn't so I signed on AIM and waited for him to sign on. When he hadn't signed on in about an hour I checked myspace again and noticed that he was not on my top friends anymore! Now I was thinking "What the fuck?" Also I noticed that it said he was online on myspace....So I switched names on AIM and sure enough he was online! I tried to ask what was up and he blocked me. I changed screen names again and finally got him to talk and he said "I did a lot of thinking and soul searching and decided I don't want to be with a guy, it's not where I want my life to go." Now I'm sorry NO ONE goes from pratically in love with you to wanting nothing to do with you that quickly and that extreme!

After thinking about it for a couple days I finally came to realize that this has nothing to do with me, but with the fact that his family has no idea and he was raised a strict christian! Now I believe in God and such and I am Catholic, but I'm for the most part what is written in the Bible I DO NOT believe! It kills me that people don't see that a lot of what is stated in the Bible is at time VERY ignorant and also usually promotes hatred, specifically towards Homosexuals! This is the kind of shit people commit suicide over....they believe that their Religion is "Law" and then repress who they really are in fear that they will "Burn in Hell!" I'm sorry but if God doesn't like Gays they why the fuck did he make us this way? Someone wanna answer me that because I've always been taught that "God made us in his image"....if that is the case then what is written in the bible about gays is BULLSHIT!!!! I DO NOT believe in a piece of writing that promotes ignorance and hatred toward ANYONE whether it be gays or whoever! Making someone feel as if they can't be who they are is just WRONG, this is America and we are ALL equal and all deserve the same rights no matter skin color, sexual preference or whatever! And while we are on the subject I also want to add that BUSH IS NOT FUCKING HELPING THE MATTER EITHER! Besides the "Gay Issue" he has done plenty of fucked up things and I'm sorry but the man should have been impeached a LONG ASS TIME AGO!! I'm not gonna even go into detail about Bush because I will be here FOREVER!

So yea I wanted to get this off my chest and if you feel like letting me know how you feel then feel free, This is my opinion and I would love to know what others think!

So yea if you feel like commenting then go for it....Later!

Feedback needed!!

2007-06-03T18:09:00.000-07:00

I'm not really sure which of the people I gave this address to really read this blog, but whoever does please take a listen to the song that is playing. The song is "She's Like The Wind" originally by Lumidee Feat. Tony Sunshine, but me and Aly decided to play around with it and what you hear is what came out. Let me know what you think! Thanks....ttyl!

Hi

2007-05-27T17:01:00.000-07:00

So I'm sitting here watching Will & Grace all by my lonesome and decided to write a little, though I'm beginning to think that no one even reads this but whatever. Anyways, Aly is still gone for a few more days, I have to pick her up Wenesday. Jason is in Philly and I kinda miss him. Amber has Gary down here now so she's been busy. I dunno guess I'm just a little lonely.....but yea so I'm gonna go, later.

Gwen Stefani Tonight!!!

2007-05-21T11:18:00.001-07:00

Well after months of waiting it's finally time to go see Gwen Stefani, and just an FYI I'll be seeing Kelly Clarkson in August!! YAY!!! TTYL!!

Texas cancelled...

2007-05-18T17:48:00.000-07:00

So over the past few days a lot has happened. The whole thing with Ryan hit a wall, and honestly it was all understandable. I mean he has a lot going on in his life right now and keeping up a very long distance relationship is a lot of work so right now just wasn't very good timing. So sadly I won't be going to Texas unless things change between now and the first week of August, so we'll see what the future holds.

Also happening is that Jason has done a complete 360. Everything that was wrong with our relationship he is now willing to work on and he has claimed to change. I guess him and his sister had a talk about him and I and turns out she told him he was pretty much a stupid bastard for treating me the way he did. I think she may have finally woken him up, but at the same time I'm still a little uneasy about getting too involved again. I may give him a small chance to prove he has changed but I don't know if things will ever be the way they were before. I'm not sure I can ever let him back in after the damage has been done.

So all in all it's been a pretty shitty week. Any advice anyone would like to give would be greatly appreciated!! And so now I leave you with a new music video! YAY, Fergie's video for "Big Girls Don't Cry" has finally been released and it's awesome! So here it is, check it out!!

On a lighter note....

2007-05-14T20:14:00.000-07:00

Here's a video for you guys to check out! Up and coming artist Nikki Flores. I believe this is her single currently, but there is no video so this one is a live video. Check it out and enjoy! Oh yea...the song is called "I Wanna Know You Like That."

I'm so sick of it..

2007-05-14T17:33:00.000-07:00

Why is it that people don't realize what they have until it's gone. I just want to move on with my life! Why is it so hard to understand that I don't want to settle down right now? I just don't understand! I'll write more later I'm just too....I don't know UGH!!!

Time for a trip people...

2007-05-13T22:28:00.000-07:00

So I just figured I would let everyone know that during the first week of August I'll be off to Texas. Who would have thought I would ever go to Texas?!?! But hey I'm going to see Ryan. I keep putting off explaining who Ryan is cause it's just a pain in the ass, but to make it short and sweet..... He likey me and I likey him LOL! He's a really sweet guy, and even though we happen to be is different states that are miles apart he has been nothing but good to me. I think it's about time that we finally meet face to face! Maybe somewhere down the line everything will fall in to place and we can really be together, but hey for now it's just time to see what the future holds and where we stand. So I'll leave you with a pic of Ryan. Laterz!

Just some knowledge!

2007-05-11T10:39:00.000-07:00

BOYS ARE DUMB!!!!

Last night

2007-05-10T11:31:00.000-07:00

Well last night was Lizz's going away party! It was like a month early but that's ok. Reminded me why we only get drunk every once in a while! We are getting too old or this shit! Also got a call from Jay who was also intoxicated, which was interesting. I'm feeling kinda ill and trying to figure out how the hell I can get Kelly Clarkson tickets so I'm gonna go. I'll post more later! Check out the videos I posted and enjoy! TTYL!

Sugarland "Want To" Music Video

2007-05-08T21:25:00.000-07:00

Amazing song by an amazing band, and it was introduced to me by someone special...sooo here it is, I'm in love with it already and hopefully you'll love it too!

Kelly Clarkson "Never Again" Music Video and Live

2007-05-08T16:19:00.000-07:00

Here's a couple videos of the ALWAYS amazing Kelly Clarkson. The first is the official music video for her first single "Never Again" off her new album "My December." The second is a live performance she did of the song on "The Today Show." Enjoy!

Kelly Clarkson- Never Again [TODAY SHOW]
Uploaded by thesweetescapeblog

Joanna "Let It Slide" Music Video!

2007-05-08T16:11:00.000-07:00

Here's the video for the song you hear when you come to my blog. It's pretty standard, some cool special effects. Song is amazing though and her voice is pretty impressive! Check it out!

Joss Stone's new Video!!

2007-05-08T09:17:00.000-07:00

I think Joss Stone is amazing and this is one of my favorite tracks on her new album "Introducing Joss Stone" Check this video out! It's very chill and the song is amazing!

The bastards disabled the video so you have to watch it on youtube! GRRRRR sorry guys!

Over for now..

2007-05-08T09:06:00.000-07:00

Well yesterday I decided that it was better for me and Jason to go our seperate ways for a while because the way things were going a friendship just wasn't working. We had a huge drawn out conversation about the flaws in our relationship again, and I finally let him have it about this "Stephen" guy. I mean yea I was upset about him seeing someone else and when we finally talked about it it almost seemed like he was surprised that I was upset. Honestly what did he think I would see?? It's been two months and he's already seeing some other guy, but whatever it's done now. I do miss talking to him, but in a sense it's like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders since yesterday.

So life moves on as they say. I've been talking to Ryan a lot lately, and he's been really sweet to me. He's been trying to keep me sane. He's such a good guy! Anyways, I'm gonna go now, lots to do today. TTYL!!!

A few thank yous...

2007-05-06T20:55:00.000-07:00

I wanted to take the chance to thank a few of my friends......

Aly....You are the one I run to when my life is falling apart, and like the friend I know you are...you always help me pick the pieces back up. It's mean me and you, "Will and Grace," for 7 years now and I don't know where the hell I would be without you! Heres to more drama down the road and more years of the stupid mindless fun we tend to have! LOVE YOU!

Amber.....My A&P partner in crime! If I didn't know any better I'd say we ruled that place! Even though you've been cheating on my with "Bai Ling" you've still been there for me when I needed you. Who else would I watch "Heroes" with and sit and ask questions about "Lost" which I do not understand to save my life. Although we don't have a lot of history it doesn't really matter. LOVE YOU!

Lizz....MY LIZZ.....I'm gonna miss you soooooo much when you go to Africa for 2 years!!!! We've been through a lot! Remember that time we got drunk and you feel asleep on my back LMAO!!!! Good times! Well I corrupted you as much as I think possible and now you're all grown up! Once again I'll miss you and thank you so much for being there when I needed you! LOVE YOU!!!

Kristin.....I bet you thought I forgot you! Well even though you ditched me tonight I do still love you! I've corrupted you just as much as Lizz. I remember when you were that shy little bakery chick who was pretty much afraid to talk to me. But now you're all growed up and despite the sometimes weird man choices, lol, you turned out OK! Congrats on graduating! LOVE YOU!!!

Ok well there it is....I Love ya'll with all my heart!

Today has been UGH...more drama!

2007-05-06T20:47:00.000-07:00

So today was another drama filled day! Jason and I didn't get along today seeing as the name of the new guy he is seeing came up a few times, and honestly I don't wanna know about it. I mean come on now! We've been broken up for about a month and a half and already, even though it was "so hard for him," he is seeing someone else. I mean I can understand that I wasn't giving him what he needed, but it still hurts. I've never had the chance to experience real heartbreak, and now that I finally do it's really not that great. I just want the pain to go away because I really do hate feeling this way. So I made the decision not to long ago that it would be better if Jason and I didn't see each other for a while in an attempt to make things easier on both of us. The way things are now I don't see either of us getting over each other any time in the near future because it's almost like we never broke up at times. Well that's pretty much it for now, I'm bringing myself down a little bit writing about this so I think I'm done. I also have a few more music related posts to get up. Until my next bitchfest!

Shoutbox

2007-05-06T20:43:00.000-07:00

So I decided that it would make life easier to have a shoutbox on here so that it would make life easier for you guys. Less complicated than leaving a comment and this way I also know exactly who is leaving them! So the shout bow is under my "About Me" section for your convenience!

What a day!!

2007-05-05T22:58:00.000-07:00

So today was interesting! Spent pretty much the whole day with Aly and we pretty much sat on our asses until about 6:30 or so. The last minute I decided I was sick of my blonde hair an wanted to dye it darker, which I ended up doing! Anyways, so eventually we made our way to Newport, RI and that was a total bust! We were supposed to meet our friend Deanna there but her phone was off and I couldn't remember the bar she said they were going to so we just walked around and checked out the hotties that were running around hehehehe! So then we came back to good ol' CT and I came home.

Talked to Ryan for a while on the way back too. He's such a sweetheart! We're working on getting him to come up here and visit so hopefully soon! I'll get into who Ryan is another time, right now I'm just too damn tired lol!!

So I'll leave you all with a picture of the new hair, even though it's a horrible picture not only because I'm tired, but because it's just bad lol. I'll post a better one when I have one. TTYL!!

Some music reccomendations!

2007-05-05T10:44:00.000-07:00

First is an album I just got by an artist named Joanna called "This Crazy Life"! Amazing talent! Look this one up and check it out, here's a pic of the album cover....

Tracklisting:
1. Let it Slide
2. Ultraviolet
3. Broken
4. Screaming Infidelities
5. 4th of July
6. Tip Toe
7. Drifter
8. The Crazy Life
9. Just When You're Leaving
10. Let Go
11. Your Obsession
12. Miracle

Next up.... Kimberley Locke "Based on a True Story"! Her sophmore album and she doesn't disapoint at all!!! Look this one up and check it out too...Heres the album cover and tracklisting for this one.

Tracklisting:
1. Change
2. Any Which Way
3. Trust Myself
4. Supawoman
5. Doin' It Tonite
6. Friend Like You
7. Fall
8. I Don't Wanna Know
9. Talk About Us
10. You Don't Have To Be Strong
11. Everyday Angels
12. Band Of Gold

Also some singles that have been released that you should lookup.....

Kelly Clarkson's new single "Never Again"! First single off her newest album "My December"

Rihanna's new single "Umbrella"! First single off her newest album "Good Girl Gone Bad"

New Artist Jon McLaughlin! Check out his single "Beautiful Disaster"

Robin Thicke's new single "Ask Myself" from his AMAZING album "The Evolution of Robin Thicke"

That's all for now guys, let me know if you check this music out and let me know what you think...I may start posting singles for you to download and listen to, but we'll see.

Out and about today everyone!

2007-05-05T08:19:00.000-07:00

Well today I'll be out and about with Aly and Deb. Then tonight I'll be in Newport to see Deanna who is here from Seattle. YAY I missed Deanna!!! Anyways, I'm sure I'll something to write about later tonight....until then everyone go enjoy the beautiful day. TTYL!!

PARIS GOT ARRESTED!!!!!!

2007-05-04T22:24:00.000-07:00

Finally they got smart....though I think she deserved more, but hey I'm not the legal system!

My love life....good lord help us!!!!

2007-05-04T20:49:00.000-07:00

So over the past week my love life has completely gone BOOM!! My ex, Jason, asked me on Monday if we could start seeing other people. Now I guess that's fine but it's also a little weird for me seeing as how we were together for a year and he still wants to be friends. Now I'm not at all afraid to admit that hey I'm just a little bit jealous, but it bothers me how calm he is about all this. Now this relationship was far from perfect and honestly I did most of the fucking up, but I did do a lot of good during our time together. There is also this nagging feeling that makes me want to just put a stop to it and try to get him back, but I'm not really sure what to do. I already know some of the nice comments that I'm gonna get about this from a certain two peoples! Anyway I don't really know what to do, it just puts me in this dark place. It also doesn't help that the guy I'm crushing on lives about half a continent away, but that's a story for another time. Leave me some comments or advice or whatever!

Wecome!

2007-05-04T20:45:00.000-07:00

Well I was sitting here thinking today about how I am unable to post certain things about my life on myspace. Then it hit me....make a different blog!!! So here it is pretty much! I'll be posting TONS of things here including anything from music and movies to my life and things happening around me. So fasten your seatbelts....it's gonna be a bumpy ride!